How to feel Loved this Valentine’s Day

 Alone on Valentine’s day -

Whether you’re very familiar with the single-rider-line or you’re just learning how to navigate singleness during a worldwide pandemic, there’s a high probability that you’ll be spending the fourteenth of February alone this year. 

As someone who has spent several valentine’s days solo (even pre-pandemic,) I would love to give you some tips on how to feel loved even when you’re feeling “blue.” 

But before I jump into that, I want you to take a minute to take some deep breaths and reflect. Here are some questions I like to ask myself as part of a grounding technique. 

• “Where am I holding tension in my body right now? Find it and release it with a deep exhale.”

• “What is an area in my life that feels good right now? What is working for me? On the flip side of that, what’s hurting right now?”

• “Name three positive attributes I see in myself and the way I present myself.” 

Okay, do you feel grounded? Maybe a little bit more confident and comfortable? I hope so! Now, let’s dive into some tips for how to spend February 14th and the days leading up to it. 

Schedule time for yourself to REST.

Rest is really important no matter who you are. For me, a perfect night-in includes a lush bubble bar, a face mask, and a hot bath. Maybe it looks like catching up on a TV show or movie you’ve been meaning to see. Or reading a favorite, feel-good book or the new best seller that your friends keep telling you to check out. Maybe it’s putting on your favorite album and having a dance party, or sitting in your ~feels~ if that’s more the vibe you’re going for. 

Do a fun photo shoot, edit, and schedule the post for Valentine’s day 

Themed photo shoots are so in right now. And I suggest you interpret Valentine’s Day however you are feeling. Maybe you do something flirty with pink. Or maybe you go anti-valentines and pick a black ensemble. Or maybe you even follow the “blueness” you’re feeling! No matter what vibe you go for, it’s important to choose a fun caption. For example, love song (or anti-love song) lyric to match.

Might I also suggest, you get your best galentines together and each post something in the same series. it’s a fun way to bring your girls together while still staying home and safe!

Cook yourself a fancy-pants dinner

Choose a meal that you know you love. Maybe try to recreate your favorite dish from your favorite restaurant that you miss? Maybe channel Leslie Knope and go for waffles? Either way, food tastes much better when you put your heart (and sweat!) into it. Take time to set up a romantic table seating for you (and maybe your roommates!) with candles, good drinks, and real dishes & silverware! Dress up or down, but make sure you feel good! 

Remember, no phones at the table! Enjoy your time and enjoy the flavors!

Get in touch with your spiritual side.
Taking time to meditate or pray is a good step to putting yourself into a peaceful and positive mindset. Personally, I love reading through scripture about how loving God is, focusing on how He loves me, and refocusing on how I can love people better.

Journal about where you are emotionally right now. Then, reflect on the things you love about the way you were created. Thank God for those things. And then do the same for the people in your life- especially the people who are different from you & maybe not the easiest to love at times. I promise by the end of this, you will feel so much more love for them as well as yourself!

Schedule a virtual hang with your gals! 

 For me, there is nothing better than a night playing board games with friends. This is one of the things I have missed most over the last year! BUT thanks to several platforms, we are able to play all sorts of games together! 

Or if games aren’t your cup of tea, try watching a movie together! Or hosting karaoke! Or just a happy-hour-catch-up-sesh! Your possibilities are endless!

Treat your nails right!

Break out the polish and lotions and give your fingers and toes some (much needed) attention! 

Take a look here at some cutesy-valentine’s-day-nail-inspo from my lovely friend, Lydia! (and check out her instagram for more inspo!)

Write a letter (even if you don’t intend on sending it!)

I find this to be extremely therapeutic and so much fun! Get out your pens and cute stationary and write! Here are some ideas!

• Write to your best friend and tell her why you love her. 
• Write to your mom / an older woman who you look up to and thank her for the ways she’s shown you love. 
• Write to your past self and tell her all the ways you’ve grown. 
• Write to your future spouse and tell them all the things (big and small) that you’re excited to experience with them. 

If you can, send it! It will light up the recipient’s day when they receive it, and who couldn’t use a little bit more sunshine these days? 

Finally, remember your worth is not defined by your relationship status, number of followers, or anything else. You are strong, brave, and full of magic! So many people love you, but what matters even more than that is that you find it in you to truly love who you are becoming. Embrace the blue! Blue doesn’t have to correlate with sadness. To me, blue is comfort and peace. And when loneliness comes, remind yourself that you are committed to loving yourself & preparing your heart to be the most healthy version of yourself. You have a lot of love to offer the world, so remember to find the people and places that you are able to pour into now, during your single years. 

Happy Love Day! 

Peace. Lil.