turning twenty-five

It's a little after 5am as I write this, on August 28th, the day before my twenty-fifth birthday. What's so special about tomorrow?

Not a ton. I'll go to work in the morning, spend some time with friends in the evening. And though I do love my birthday (something about being 1/9 kids in my family and wired to love attention...enneagram 3s, ya feel me?)

But there's something really special about turning twenty-five. 

There's been a lot of change in my life since my last post in 2021. In fact, I have another blog drafted just with updates. Here's a snippet from that:

"It's been (over) a year, and what a year it's been. 

I started writing for this blog as a place for me to hold my thoughts and then get them out into the world. I was working on projects (hey enneagram 1s and 9s, I know you feel neglected, but I haven't forgotten you!) that I wanted to share with friends. I had tons of ideas for posts and stories I could tell. 

I was excited! I was energized! I was ready!!

I was not expecting my life to change in the ways it did over the last year (or so...) 

Some really cool things have happened!

• I moved a LOT - but am currently living in a house with 20 other individuals & my kitty, Lando! I love co-living because, like my house was growing up, there's always something to do or someone to spend time with. 
• I returned to a job working with marginalized individuals. It is simultaneously challenging and life-giving. 
• I launched Squid Ink Collective with my sister and life-long creative partner. We produced our first ever musical and have lots of creative projects in the works.
• I got a couple new tattoos! (A quote: "and follow the sun" which comes from a One Direction song, and goes along with a quote Sadie got. And a green pumpkin: which is a story for another time.)

So... big career changes, big lifestyle changes... I have to have come away from all of this with some sort of huge and meaningful life lesson, right? 

Not really.

Sure, I have learned a lot. Mostly about myself and the atmospheres I prefer to work in. What triggers my anxiety. What I need when I have the desire to create. But none of those things would make a good blog post. (I am still figuring out how to phrase them internally, it's be a big mess if I tried to write anything down for a reader.)

BUT - I have decided to give myself a couple loose goals for 2023. 

1. Read a lot more. Everyday, try to read something for fun. Always carry a book with me. 

2. Write a lot more. Figure out the stories in my head and flush them out. Or at least get some words out on pages so I can edit them. (Editing has always been a fun part of the creative process for me.)"

So, have I kept these goals? Sort of! I have been intentional about spending what little free time I have reading and writing. I recently broke 5,000 words on a story that's been rattling around in my brain for years and have lots of plans and words to continue it. For anyone who knows me, you know how big this is. I am always working on a new project and they often get left to the side as I take on a new one. (Commitment is hard.) 

But what about turning 25? 

It feels big. I feel energized. I feel excited to enter a new chapter. A new chapter in my house with new people who seem equally energized and excited to contribute. A new chapter in my life where I feel committed to meeting goals and leaning into my calling. I feel like the Lord's been stirring my heart to be ready for something big, but don't know what it is yet. I feel fuller of more joy and more love than I know what to do with. And so, reader, I am writing this so that I have something to look back on in the years to come. I hope you will hold me accountable and I hope you will ask me about what I am learning and working on. 

The first thing I am working on which I am ready to share with you, is the next post in the Soundtrack to your Enneagram series I started years ago. Be on the lookout for my post about enneagram nines, finally, coming on Wednesday. 

Anyway, these are the rambling thoughts of an early morning when a 24-year-old felt inspired to write some things down the day before her birthday. 

Thanks for being here. 

Peace. Lil.